How to Care for Your Pet Ghost
One day, the ghost showed up.
I didn’t know where he came from. Perhaps he followed me home from the cinema?
He wore a shapeless white smock. When we got home, he took the smock off. If you’ve never seen underneath a ghost’s smock before, it can be quite disconcerting.
He had six eyes, arranged in two columns on either side of his face. He had a thousand arms that waved in the air, like tentacles.
He didn’t say anything. He just sat there, moping. I could tell he wanted attention, though.
Learning about your ghost
I didn’t know anything about how to care for a ghost, so I did some research.
I went to the library and looked up all the books on ghosts. They weren’t very helpful. Literary ghosts are nothing like the real thing.
I spoke to my uncle, who worked on a ghost farm in Tasmania when he was a young man.
“Don’t give him too much to eat,” he said. “He’ll become dependent on you, and will forget how to feed himself.”
I tried to follow my uncle’s advice, but my ghost just looked so sad all the time that I couldn’t help myself. If I had any boiled eggs left over from…